After an extensive night of drinking, I like to fill my stomach with a lot of food. Most of which has catastrophic effects on my gaunt figure. I find that nothing screams “eat me” like pizza, that is other than Floyd’s mom, so I always have to grab a slice or two after going to the bars.
A couple of weeks ago I was waiting in line for my pizza, and as I was looking around I noticed the girl behind me. She was attractive, and my lack of inhibitions underhanded me an opportunity I couldn’t pass up. I gave her the down up and said “I like your skirt. It’s very revealing.” She did the same to me and retorted, “I like your shoes. They remind me of the kind my dad would wear when he used to drop me off at school.”
I exploded. I’ve never been in the presence of a girl with wit like that before, so I was immediately attracted to her, tenfold. She burned me better than any girl’s burned me before, and I was excited to be around this firecracker. I wish I remembered her name, ’cause I was stoked with her sense of humor. She tore me a new one, and I laughed like you couldn’t even imagine. I wish more girls were like her, ’cause other than this girl and Tina Fey, I’ve yet to be really impressed.
Tags: Floyd's Mom, Inebriation, Pizza, Revealing Skirts, The Matches, Tina Fey, Wit
